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Husband Demands A Paternity Test From His Pregnant Wife, She Tells Him To File For Divorce
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Husband Demands A Paternity Test From His Pregnant Wife, She Tells Him To File For Divorce

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Trust is a crucial part of any relationship, especially a romantic one. And even more so when it’s a lifelong commitment. The ‘True Off My Chest’ community recently discussed this topic after the redditor u/No-Surprise6398 opened up about the lack of trust in her marriage.

Admitting she just needed to vent, she said her husband demanded a paternity test for their unborn child. Even though their marriage wasn’t problem-free, such a request came completely out of the blue. And unsurprisingly, it took a toll on the relationship.

Trust is the glue that holds any relationship together

Image credits: LightFieldStudios (not the actual photo)

Pregnant woman opens up about the lack of trust from her husband, which led to huge problems in their marriage

Image credits: halfpoint (not the actual photo)

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Image credits: Andrew Neel (not the actual photo)

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Credits: No-Surprise6398

Trust is important when forming any sort of relationship, whether it’s romantic, platonic, or work-related

Trust is a complex matter, but without it, forming any sort of relationship is close to impossible. Whether it’s friendship, romantic links, or partnerships at work, it is the foundation that keeps everything else steady. Consequently, the moment the first cracks start to appear, there’s a high chance of everything you’ve built together collapsing.

At work, it can help create a high-trust organization, which usually entails higher levels of energy and productivity. When it comes to friendships, trust is a vital component that helps create a stronger bond. As for the romantic ties, it becomes a tool that is necessary to build a strong and healthy relationship.

Viewing trust as a tool was suggested by the National Healthy Marriage Resource Center (NHMRC). In their article about why trust matters in relationships and marriage, they also pointed out five key elements that can help develop it: time, reliability, understanding, sacrifice, and thankfulness.

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Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)

A likely reason behind the OP’s husband’s demands is lack of trust, which might relate to other aspects of their marriage as well

In the OP’s situation, one of the five seems to be more significant than others. She revealed that there have been problems in their marriage that have occurred repeatedly, which led to her eventually letting certain things go. It relates to what NHMRC emphasizes when it comes to sacrifice in relation to marriage and trust—it only develops when both parties exhibit behaviors of sacrificing something for one another.

The article pointed out that many people (sometimes unknowingly) expect their partner to sacrifice more than they do themselves. It also revealed that it might lead to resentment: “Sacrifices of both partners must be balanced and must be mutual in order to avoid any resentment of one partner toward the other. A healthy marriage is the product of two individuals, each making sacrifices for each other to better the relationship.” Whether it was resentment or emotions of being hurt that encouraged the OP, she spoke up about the problems after her husband demanded the paternity test.

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Image credits: SHVETS production (not the actual photo)

Such demands might be painful to some people, which is why it’s important to find the right way to approach it

The OP’s husband was far from the only one to demand such a thing. In the US, roughly 300,000 paternity tests are performed each year, with men favoring it more than women. However, this remains a rather sensitive topic to bring up as people can get hurt by such requests or what they imply.

The question whether it’s wrong to ask a paternity test from your partner is a debatable one. Be that as it may, it’s usually advisable to think long and hard about what’s the best way to approach it, since, as the OP’s story proved, people might find it painful. Psychreg points out that it can be difficult to bear for the fathers as well, as the process can evoke confusion or guilt, and other negative emotions.

The OP refused to do the test and suggested that the husband file for divorce if he persisted. For her, the implication behind his demand was a strong enough argument to pack up the things and go. Redditors in the comments supported her; some, however, saw no problem in what the husband was asking for. Be that as it may, the situation shows that questioning your partner in such a way can break the trust and shatter the foundation, which is often difficult to rebuild.

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Image credits: Nataliya Vaitkevich (not the actual photo)

Bored Panda has reached out to the user No-Surprise6398 via Reddit, and we’ll update the article once we hear back from her.

People in the comments showed their support for the woman

Some even suggested she should serve the results of the paternity test together with the divorce papers

Other community members saw no harm in asking for a paternity test

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serena_6 avatar
Snow_White
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Who the f**k are these people saying it's ok to ask for paternity test in this case??

ariawhitaker avatar
Aria Whitaker
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thank you!! All those posters were more than likely insecure, fragile men just like OP's husband. They see nothing wrong in basically accusing someone of cheating with zero reason or cause. Her feelings, apparently, about not being trusted are of no concern....only his 100% assurance matters. She stuck with him even though she hasnt had good sex in over 6 years, has to deal with his fragility and had issues conceiving. And yet she STILL gets rudely accused of being unfaithful...all because HE doesn't know how to properly lay the pipe lol. No, do not cater to insecurity and immaturity, it is about MUCH more than " a piece of paper".

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isabel312001 avatar
Isa
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's projecting...maybe I'm wrong but maybe he is the one that is cheating...

tk421 avatar
TK 421
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He’s a sad little man child. Clearly he’s never matured enough to live the life of a man. This scenario will only repeat, even if you do get the test to prove to him that he’s a jerk and needs to grow up and be a man.

carterrkk1961 avatar
Karen
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Equally 'never matured enough' in the bedroom either. Seriously! How 'HARD' (yes - pun intended) can it be to learn how to satisfy a woman? Find a therapist who specializes in that area; DON'T, I repeat DON'T get your education from the 'Hustler' or 'XTSY' or other adult entertainment Channels and expect that will 'do the trick.'

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serena_6 avatar
Snow_White
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Who the f**k are these people saying it's ok to ask for paternity test in this case??

ariawhitaker avatar
Aria Whitaker
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Thank you!! All those posters were more than likely insecure, fragile men just like OP's husband. They see nothing wrong in basically accusing someone of cheating with zero reason or cause. Her feelings, apparently, about not being trusted are of no concern....only his 100% assurance matters. She stuck with him even though she hasnt had good sex in over 6 years, has to deal with his fragility and had issues conceiving. And yet she STILL gets rudely accused of being unfaithful...all because HE doesn't know how to properly lay the pipe lol. No, do not cater to insecurity and immaturity, it is about MUCH more than " a piece of paper".

Load More Replies...
isabel312001 avatar
Isa
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He's projecting...maybe I'm wrong but maybe he is the one that is cheating...

tk421 avatar
TK 421
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

He’s a sad little man child. Clearly he’s never matured enough to live the life of a man. This scenario will only repeat, even if you do get the test to prove to him that he’s a jerk and needs to grow up and be a man.

carterrkk1961 avatar
Karen
Community Member
1 year ago DotsCreated by potrace 1.15, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2017

Equally 'never matured enough' in the bedroom either. Seriously! How 'HARD' (yes - pun intended) can it be to learn how to satisfy a woman? Find a therapist who specializes in that area; DON'T, I repeat DON'T get your education from the 'Hustler' or 'XTSY' or other adult entertainment Channels and expect that will 'do the trick.'

Load More Replies...
Load More Comments
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